All Your Turkeys Are Belong to Us

It turns out, much in my favor, that killing turkeys whilst fucking them for the enhancement of sexual pleasure is a well-established component of a larger category of human sexual expression known as avisodomy. I'll just type that word again, because the letters fall into place so wonderfully: avisodomy. I would argue that the actual killing of the animal while fucking it crosses boundaries of another form of *ahem* sexual expression: that of sadism. But each to his or her own. To wit, the Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices, written by the rather aptly-named Brenda Love, chronicles a number of different fetishistic human sexual practices, including one that apparently occurred in brothels: namely, that the proprietors would issue a goose or turkey to visiting customers who would then...

...and I've described the rest already!

So: keep reading my blog, because I've now shown proof that turkey killfucking isn't a fantasy materialized from my alcohol-addled brain; rather it is an entry, nay, a mere footnoot in a rather interesting volume written and compiled by a licensed pilot, skydiver, columnist and sexologist:

I truly enjoy the book, despite my making light of the turkeykillfucking (or was it geese?) described therein. It really would be a useful curio to most and, presumably, a wonderful idea farm for others. I stole this picture of Brenda Love from Amazon.com; I can only assume that no one gives a shit.


  1. NIce to see your horizons expanding Drew; I think too much rock climbing was really holding you back- your true colors are shining through!