5.18.2010

This, That and the Other Thing

Well, it's another pleasant day here in Lumberton: tornadoes in eastern Colorado/northern Texas/western Oklahoma; oil spills in the Gulf of Mexico; nuclear armaments threatening a second international Cold War; Virgin Mary likenesses in peanut butter sandwiches; cat-piss scented chemical clouds from methamphetamine lab explosions creating fog banks over central California resulting in numerous altercations between gridlocked commuters on rural highways whose sweat-soaked garments stick both to their pallid, clammy skin and to the seats of their cars as their impotent air conditioning units sputter and struggle in the 105-degree afternoon heat exacerbated all the more by both the greenhouse effect of the fog and by the hole in the ozone layer overhead that is etched bigger and bigger by the chlorofluorocarbon emissions spewing from the aforementioned air conditioning compressors as they struggle to store energy from the ambient moisture in the cabin air of the vehicles via latent heat of condensation but fail to achieve more than an approximate 63.4% efficiency in the torrid late Spring high pressure build-up as the polar jet is effectively pushed to more northern latitudes by more consistent seasonal diurnal heating patterns due to the tilt of the Earth's axis the inception of which may as well, for all intents and purposes, have been the vibrational energies and flavors of certain subatomic particles compacted into a theoretical singularity better known in temporal terms as the 'pre big-bang' which in a matter of pico and nanoseconds would undergo a relativistic expansion whose reference frames would paradoxically exceed the speed of light until a certain point in the expansion when the matter would have cooled sufficiently enough for symmetry breaking phase transitions to allow the four primary quantum physical forces of our universe, as we understand them in our imperfect fashion, to precipitate out and begin governing the interactions of particles: the gravitational, weak and strong nuclear and the electromagnetic forces whose immutable attributes are, in fact, a perplexing look into our lack of a unifying theory that accurately describes the machinations of our universe so that we remain, in terms of matter, in a curious state of predestination secondary to inertia.

2 comments:

  1. If you are going to insist on these extended and verbose statements (which I do enjoy reading), might I request a layout change to white on black versus black on white to reduce eye strain?

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  2. Which browser shows black on white? I can imagine the corneal spasms. That must be anomalous because it's always white on black in Firefox. Also, I do insist.

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